Tragic Valley News

January 31, 2010

QUESTION OF THE WEAK: Why is the PUPPET Mayor runing ant thar know shame?

TRAGIC VALLEY ELECTRIC SYSTEM

The power is still on. Did sum body screw up? Nope just weren't no ice! In further news thar will be a ah shucks party given by the bosses this weekend, Cause theys be wantin to make nice with the womens.

Mr. AMPS,reporting

TRAGIC VALLEY COURTHOUSE

The Puppet Mayor is in debt up to his woodin eyeballs and wants U to bale him out so be sure to give hims your volts. Commish FORKEDTONGUE is making like hes will be his cam pain manager. The commish thinks he be just the guy fors the job now that he has warmed up.

Mr. IBENGOOFINOFF,reporting

EDITORAL

Ant it great that's wes can leav thangs just tu ways theys are. Heck we justs don't wants you to goes and volts please stays home and lets them crooks duz likes theys always duzs. Please keeps the same bunch cause its hard to break in a news bunch.

WHO CARES, editor

March 1, 2010

QUESTION OF THE WEAK: Have ya noticed The word jobs poping up must be election time?

TRAGIC VALLEY COURTHOUSE

The Tragic Valley Puppet mayor dun went and saved the valley. Yep he be the one that applied for grants and bought us jobs, jobs, jobs. You no thems jobs he promised us. At least he be a boy that wont lie to ya a tall.

Read More...

February 21, 2010

QUESTION OF THE WEAK: Say recond how far below the bottom can a valley go when compared to other valleys?

Well we folks what lives in T. Valley noes that a storm is a brewing.

Yep that thar bunch what runs the dump is trying to gets us an up dated version of the puppet mayor. You noes one with know strings.

Read More...

February 12, 2010

QUESTION OF THE WEAK: Why is it that this hear Valley don't need no food for thought?

TRAGIC VALLEY COURTHOUSE

Well lordy be the PUPPET Mayor dun went an did him a news release. "Yes, I be bes da one that what formed the SPLINTER group. Yep I is the daddy of thems being so many running in the mayors race."

Read More...